RACINE — Do you provide care for a loved one and also juggle the demands of your employment?
Everyone needs help from time to time, sometimes it is just a tough week when lots of little things go wrong, and still other times we simply find we are unable to do all the things we used to do. As a “caregiver,” the responsibilities can feel purely overwhelming at times. Whatever the case, we all find ourselves in a position where we need a little bit of help.
The Aging & Disability Resource Center of Racine County is offering a virtual seminar at 1 p.m. May 25 called “Care in the Home.” This presentation for caregivers of adults will cover planning for care needs, types of home care, the cost of care options and information to meet your needs.
For information about registering for the event, contact the ADRC at 262-833-8777.
According to the AARP, caregiving responsibilities pressured workers into quitting their jobs and applying for unemployment benefits as the COVID-19 pandemic developed in the United States. A survey reported by the AARP found that more than a third of caregivers who quit did so to look after a sick family member.
Caregiving responsibilities also pose a barrier to workforce re-entry for unemployment insurance recipients.
It can be so hard to ask for help.
“We are taught to take care of ourselves, and see asking for help as a sign of weakness,” said Jane Mahoney, Older Americans Act Consultant for the Greater Wisconsin Agency on Aging Resources.
“We may tell ourselves that it will get better or that there isn’t anything anyone else can do anyway,” Mahoney continued. “As a caregiver, we may feel that no one else can really do our job. We may even talk ourselves into thinking we actually don’t need help, but deep down, we know we could use some assistance. Admitting that we need help is the first step to getting help.”
The caregiving issue didn’t arise only during the pandemic, nor will it disappear with it, according to the AARP.
Research has shown that caregiving duties impacted worker’ absenteeism and productivity before COVID-19 reached the U.S. In a survey, 86% of respondents said they had stayed home from work to care for a family member or pet at least a few times per year; more than half said they did so at least once every couple of months.
When you are ready to ask for help in your caregiving responsibilities, be specific in what you need the most.
Sometimes you need something tangible like groceries or medications delivered, a ride to an appointment, your house cleaned, or a meal prepared. Other times you may just need someone to talk to. If you’re not sure what you need, ask a friend, relative or counselor to help you, take a minute and write down your needs. Allowing yourself to name your needs can be hard, but it is a necessary step to getting help.
While you review your list of needs, determine the times you need help the most so that you may arrange for help ahead of time, Mahoney advises. Then think about the people you know who you might be able to help.
“Consider asking neighbors, people you have met at church or community centers as well as family and friends,” Mahoney said. “Many people would feel honored to be asked to help.”
Sometimes when people offer to help, it may catch you off guard and you can’t think of anything you need right at that moment. To remedy this, keep a pencil and paper handy and write down the various things you could use help with as you think of them. Then, when people ask, “How can I help you?” you can simply consult your list and give them a specific task.
Writing things down as you think of them helps you remember the things you need, and it also allows people to choose something that they feel most comfortable with.
The next step is to continue to evaluate your situation. Needs change. You may find that you no longer need what you did before. Or there may be different areas where help is needed. Just make sure you are getting all your needs met so you can be as healthy and happy as possible.
There are many resources at the Aging & Disability Resource Center that could offer assistance.
For more information about care in the home and local resources that are available, contact the ADRC at 262-833-8777. And remember to join the virtual event, “Care in the Home,” on May 25 at 1 p.m.
