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Dear Answer Angel Ellen: A good friend of mine, when we see each other for the first time in awhile, opens the conversation with self-criticism about her looks. "Sorry my hair is a mess." "I was running late so didn't even have time to put on lipstick." "I've put on weight since I saw you last." "I wanted to change my clothes but..." You get the idea. First of all, I would never have paid any attention to any of this if she hadn't brought it up. But how do I tell her to stop running her appearance down? — Kathi G.

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